Part One: Healing ourselves through forgiving others
It has been my experience that when I am explaining a concept to someone, the process of putting it together in my mind challenges me to quantify parts of it that I didn’t have to previously. I find that these conversations are always very rewarding, and today I was blessed with a conversation about the importance of Forgiveness.
Forgiveness detaches you
When I visualize a Traumatic Event either in myself or when working with someone, there is a cord/channel between the aggressor of the trauma and the victim. In the middle of the cord/channel sits the Traumatic Event, acting as an energy pump that saps energy from the victim and feeds it to the aggressor. Every time the victim remembers the trauma, the aggressor gets energy. Every time the victim changes something in their life to deal with the effects of the trauma, the aggressor gets energy.
People walk around their whole lives, amassing these cords and giving away their energy, and they forget that they were born with a tool sharp enough to cut the thickest of these cords quicker than a soda can in a Ron Popeil infomercial. The blade of Forgiveness is already YOURS for the low, low price of FREE!
When you truly forgive a person for transgression against you in your heart, the forgiveness cuts the energy cord between you and the Traumatic Event. The benefits are two-fold. First, you instantly stop the flow of energy from you to the aggressor. With that energy drain removed, your soul will start to heal the damage from where the energy cord was attached. You will naturally start to undo the biases you applied to situations based on the Traumatic Event.
As I was telling my friend of the importance of Forgiveness today, the second benefit just came out after the first as if it had always been a part of my view. Through forgiving someone else, we are only cutting our end of the cord. The aggressor is now sitting there with a cord connected to a pump, but the hose on the other end is now laying on the ground doing nothing.
If the aggressor had no intention of seeking forgiveness, don’t worry. You haven’t given them a free pass, you’ve given them an Albatross. The Traumatic Event has its own energy requirement and without you there to power it, it has to draw all of its energy from the aggressor. Not only have you liberated yourself from the energetic debt, but you have also karmic-ally ‘Pantsed’ your aggressor in ways they won’t understand for lifetimes…
…and it can detach them
The energy transaction of Forgiveness has 2 different mechanisms, one for each side of the transgression. This is illustrated perfectly through the “Lord’s Prayer” in Matthew 6:12
And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors
“As we forgive our debtors” is our side of the energy transaction. OUR forgiveness of our debtors disconnects us from the transaction leaving us free of it. But what about the person who is on the other side of the transaction, being dragged down by their Albatross of Trauma? What if the person doesn’t accept doesn’t accept your apology and give you forgiveness?
When you are saying the Lord’s Prayer, who are you saying it to? If you said “The Lord” or any of the other names the Creator goes by, you are correct. It is that simple for once! Now that we have context of who we are addressing, it becomes clear who we are to ask forgiveness from. “And forgive us our debts” is us asking the Lord to forgive us for our debts, not the people that we owe them to. It never hurts to apologize to the person you have transgressed against either. That reminds me of a line from the movie ‘O Brother, Where Art Thou’ where Everett says, “Even if it did put you square with the Lord, the state of Mississippi’s a little more hardnosed…”